Today’s apple polisher…

Do you remember those days when your mother asked you to study hard to ensure that you have a good future? Well all those are the things of the past. In today’s world intelligence might be useful but not as useful as apple polishing.

If schools would like their students to be able to get a good job in the future, be sure that they create a new class called bodek class… at practical exam, get them to polish a man with high pride. If he likes it then give them an A.

Many people in Malaysia benefited from having the polishing skills. Well I’ve seen many myself. Let me tell you one of many that I’ve seen before.

Now there is a lady from a foreign nationality was posted in my office as Finance Director. She had trained well at her polishing skills. If you ask me her job description, my answer is below

1. Feed boss’s favorite dog every morning.
2. At lunch be sure to feed the boss himself. Don’t pack food, cook for him. The best way to get to a man’s heart is through his tummy
3. Chat with the boss whenever possible
4. If anyone does any minor mistake, make it big and tell the boss
5. If you did any mistake, shut up and use your power to make everyone else shut up. Ensure that the news did not reach the boss
6. If required, make a scrape goat out of anybody to take the blame
7. If there is something that you forget to do even though after reminders, act naïve and say no one told you before. If there is a black and white, blame it on IT.
8. Make people’s life miserable. If they have a good life they will have time to plan for your downfall
9. Whatever the boss said just say yes. Don’t worry, its your subordinates that needs to do the job regardless if they like it or not.
10. When boss is complaining about anyone else, try to recall past wrong doings and increase the problem.
11. When an issue arises, don’t find solutions. Find who is at the fault and put him to the boss’s office
12. When boss praise a job well done accept the complement, otherwise say who did it
13. Cut cost. Cut toilet paper, cut water usage, cut electricity cut wages and cut bonuses.
14. Say that you will stay late to complete a certain task but put an idiot to do it after the boss left

Anyway I will write more if I could recall more. Every morning before she does any work, she will ensure that the dog is fed. Then make breakfast for the boss and go back to her room. In the room, continue to look busy at facebook.com. when boss is free, go to his room and talk nonsense

At lunch wait for boss for lunch. If possible cook for him. Never leave the boss’s sight. Do some job for the rest of the day. If there is some dirty job to be done, assign it to someone. If he rejects the task, tell the boss.

Everyone hates her. She knew it but the boss don’t. And my boss dare to tell me that its difficult to polish him and change his mind. My understanding? Its so damn easy

Boys and girls if you need to learn, just learn the basic of school education and practice more on apple polishing. You will gain more from it.

People used to say “Bullshit could take you higher but cant keep you there”. In today’s world, all you need to do is to have continuous bullshit everyday to maintain the momentum and stay high. When things go wrong, bullshit somewhere else. There are companies everywhere

Crazy and Nasty Bosses

Despite the fact that the offer letter had been defined that resignation requires one month notice, some bosses could really turn and twist the story and makes it otherwise. I have a real life story of an unfortunate friend of mine. Below is her side of story…

Miss Yap (not her real name) had been attached to a company for more than 5 years now and as she could no longer stand the pressure of her job she had decided to put an end to it.

Miss yap was promoted from an executive to a manager during her employment in the company. When she got promoted, a new offer letter was signed and given to her. In the letter, it mentioned that she will get an amount of salary and notice of termination is as per her employment offer letter. In her first offer letter, notice of resignation clearly states that it requires one month.

After she found a new job, Miss yap tendered her resignation with a month notice and waited for the bosses news and advise on her last day of employment but in vain. Again and again she asked the secretary but still no news. When finally there are news about her last day, it was a bad news.

The boss said that she requires 3 months notice for resignation. Now calling in 2 other senior positioned employees, the boss forced the poor miss yap to sign a letter which states that she requires 1 and a half month notice. How did he forced her? Well the boss said that if she refuse to sign the letter, she will be charged under improper handover and shall be sued. The boss also said that he had consulted the company’s lawyer that it could be done. Now miss yap wanted to handover her job to the boss but he refused. (the boss is miss yap’s immediate superior and have no subordinates as all had resigned)

After such pressure and circumstances, Miss Yap unwillingly signed the letter and the 2 management employees act as a witness. Now after signing the letter, the boss said her last day will be 1 and a half month away. From here it might not look different but in actual fact, the boss had delayed the news for more than 2 weeks.

In other words, in order for miss yap to resign it requires 2 months notice. Considering that you are the employer of the new company, will you wait? Of course the poor lady lost her new job as well. Acting like a good boss, the boss said to Yap that he will consider to rehire her back if she would like to (in a manner that he is doing a favor for her).

What is the point of this story? Its just a reminder to folks out there that bosses could be really nasty if they want to. When you get a good boss, stick with them. It’s a jungle out there.

Now here are my questions…
1. Is it true that the boss could charge yap for improper handover despite the fact that she wanted to handover all these while?
2. Can the boss delay the news and treat it as null?
3. I believe that in the worst case scenario, Miss yap might need to pay the indemnity of maximum the number of days that she did not serve the notice.
4. What can be done to prevent such case from happening to anyone else?
5. Doesn’t Malaysian government have any rules which could prevent such cases from happening again?

If you do know the answer, please do feel free to comment as I would like to learn and prevent it from happening to me